|Written on 11/03/13 at 01:23:50 EST by Jeanniesbottle|
|Having my world ripped apart by lies and deception
has sent my world spinning into a kind of kaleidoscope
where I do not know which end is up
and everything feels all topsy turvy.
I question where I stand with everyone in my life
based on one person's deceit
resenting myself for the power that I allowed
one person to have over me and how I see the world.
Lost in a sea of dark stormy waters
looking for a lighthouse to guide me home
because although I try to find my own inner light
it feels very dampened by the dark night.
I feel the need to know where I stand with people
because now I find myself questioning where I stand,
where I really stand, with all of those in my life.
I question whether those in my life really want me there
or if they are there for me out of pity rather than
truly wanting to be there for me.
I want to be loved for me, for all that I am, good and bad.
To be loved unconditionally is a great gift and to not
be loved that way by the one you really want to be loved by
breaks my soul a little at a time.
My heart has been torn into a trillion shreds,
perhaps even more if there's a number to notate that,
and now I feel that my world has become a kaleidoscope.
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